It is nighttime, and the moon is only half-full in the pre-summer sky. In combination with the streetlamps, it creates just enough light to cast my shadow out before me. I follow this over the familiar earthen trials to the edge of the forest I’ve grown to hate and love over the course of my first year here in Ashland.

I feel like I am being followed…

Some primal twinge of understanding deep within my chest sends out a warning to my brain that something isn’t right: I should turn back and find my friends, for there is safety in numbers.

But another part of me says, “Wait. No. You’ll lead the danger right to them.” And so I keep walking, taking comfort in the knowledge that I know these woods better than anyone else around. I can lose my tracker in the most remote parts of the park, where there are no streetlamps and where the trees grow too thick for even the moon to penetrate.

The end of the lighted trail is just ahead. Beyond it, there is darkness, and in the darkness, there is safety.

My pace quickens, though by no means out of fear. I am the most terrifying Force of Nature in these woods tonight, and not even the recent reports of mountain lions in the area can change that.

There is a knife in my hand. There is a confidence in my stride. I am making it clear through my body language and posture that I am not one to be fucked with.

Yet the primal urging in my chest which tells me I’m in danger only grows stronger, and I feel my grip on the knife tighten, stretching the scabs over my bruised and torn-up knuckles until they crack and bleed.

I am entering the darkness of the forest now, leaving the last streetlight in Lithia Park behind me. Like the doorway to some ancient citadel, the trees tower ominously over the path I am about to take.

My senses are heightened as my brain jumps into survival mode. Movement, contrast, sounds and smells all seem much more intense. If I were not used to the woodshock, this would be the point at which I’d begin to panic. But on the contrary, I feel safer now that I am away from the light, because in the darkness, it is easier for me to face my enemy.

Out of sight of the streetlamp’s glare, I take a moment to let my eyes adjust, and then I slink away up the trail, hoping that the darkness will have kept my pursuer at bay. Now, deeper into the woods, the feeling of unease lifts just slightly, and I feel confident enough to pass by a clearing in the trees where the moonlight sifts through the canopy.

It is not until I’m standing in the very middle of this clearing that my unease returns with a vengeance. I stop dead in my tracks, feeling as though a weighted net has been tossed over my shoulders. Then, a twig snaps to my right at the very edge of the treeline. I turn to face the sound, knife at the ready, heart pounding, knuckles still slick with old blood.

A figure is standing there between two trees, almost impossible to recognize, just out of reach of the moonlight. But the way he holds himself is distinct: proud, overly-confident, and guarded.

I am about to let out a sigh of relief, but suddenly, he holds up his arm as if he’s pointing an accusing finger at me and the moonlight catches something cold and silver in his hand.

I cannot properly describe what it’s like to see this. 

The gun practically glows in the darkness, and the feeling of dread that grips me nearly drags me down into the earth. But the rush of defiance I feel thereafter is equally as strong, and I know that I cannot run. If he shoots me, then so be it: I will not fall right away; I will stand long enough to show him that I’m not dying because I want to, but because I have to.

He pulls back the hammer and fires...

A NOTE ON ZOOS...

I take a lot of photos of wild animals living in zoos. People often look at my work and ask, "If you're for animal welfare, why do you support these zoos?"

My answer is this:

Zoos can be both a blessing and a curse. Many zoos in the world today make their money by exploiting their animals for human entertainment. But others exist for the purpose of perpetuating conservation and education, and, in many ways, could be the only way to save certain species from extinction.

What lot of people don't understand is that in the United States, zoos can become accredited by an organization known as the AZA, the American Association of Zoos and Aquariums. They operate to establish a new standard for zoos, focusing on breeding programs and advances in animal care tactics. All zoos accredited by the AZA must meet a series a grueling standards, including proper enclosure size, exceptional animal care and husbandry, and an intense focus on conservation.

These AZA zoos have established a program called the Species Survival Plan, which focuses on increasing the genetic diversity of captive zoo animals. After all, an increased genetic diversity is vital to keeping a species alive.

It is a common misconception today that zoo animals are taken from the wild. AZA animals are actually the ancestors of breeding stock which was captured more than 80 years ago; thus, wild animals currently housed in captivity are not removed from any natural habitat at all. The only exception to this rule is for animals which are in need of rescue, and which cannot be released back into the wild, such as the case with Jack and Athena, two bald eagles at the Oregon Zoo who were rescued after being struck by cars. Jack has only one eye and Athena is unable to fly properly.

The Oregon Zoo houses several other birds of prey which were also unfortunate victims of car collisions and attempted poaching. Like Jack and Athena, they too are unfit to survive in the wild as a result of their injuries. Instead of being put down, they now act as wildlife ambassadors to help raise awareness for endangered birds of prey. The Oregon Zoo also has a mountain lion which was rescued as an orphan, who is now the proud mother of the very first cougar cub born at an AZA zoo in over 15 years. In California, the San Diego zoo houses a white tiger which was confiscated by customs at the California-Mexico boarder after being discovered in the back seat of a drug kingpin's car. And many other zoos around the country keep rescued exotic 'pets' in their care, as well.

Through the efforts of the Species Survival Plan, many rare and endangered animals are now facing a brighter future. Using captive specimens, biologists can artificially inseminate wild specimens which would otherwise have trouble finding a mate among their fractured populations in an effort to increase their numbers.

Likewise, it gives scientists and opportunity to learn from animals without having to disturb them in their natural habitats.

A prime example of this would be the case of a biologist studying elephants at the Oregon Zoo, trying to figure out how the giants communicated over vast distances. One day, while taking notes, she noticed that she could feel a very slight tremor travel through the concrete floor she and the elephant were standing on. This lead to the discovery of something remarkable: Elephants could communicate by emitting low-frequency rumbles which could travel through the ground without making any audible sound at all!

If you enjoy zoos, but are not sure which ones to support and which to stay away from, do what I do: ONLY support AZA-accredited zoos and registered non-profit rescues centers. Avoid non-accredited zoos, and any rescue center which is not a registered non-profit. All AZA zoos will state their affiliation with the AZA and the Species Survival Plan on their websites, so you can look them up before you even leave your house.

The lion above was photographed at the Wildlife Safari Park in Bandon, Oregon. He has been there for ages and shares his enclosure with an ancient old female. They have no grass to walk on, just gravel, and aside from a few driftwood logs to rub against, they have no engaging features in their enclosure whatsoever.

Naturally, I hate to support non-accredited establishments, but made just one exception in order to photograph the conditions roadside zoo animals are kept in to illustrate my point. I have since emailed the keepers at the Wildlife Safari Park regarding the condition of their charges, and never heard back from them. I could go on and on about how many photos I see of their zoo, featuring images of people holding adorable baby animals, yet I never see pictures of these animals as adults later on. Where are they going? Where did they come from in the first place? Since they've never answered a single one of my emails, I can only presume they don't want people to know the answers to these questions, which raises my suspicions all the more.

PLEASE, do what you can to spread the word about zoos and their place in conservation, but don't forget to inform people that there are also many bad zoos out there with no morals and little regard for the welfare of the animals.

More info on roadside zoos and why they should be abolished here:

http://www.suite101.com/content/the-horrors-of-roadside-zoos-a84744

http://www.nhes.org/articles/view/785

http://www.aspca.org/about-us/policy-positions/zoos-and-aquariums.aspx

They've Stolen Your Pets...

I wasn't originally going to post this here, but I've decided that it's important.

It’s a nice summer day and your dogs are playing out in the yard as they often do. You keep them fenced in so that they don’t escape and wreak havoc on the neighbor’s flower beds, but trust that they’ll behave while you make a quick trip to the store to pick up something for dinner. When you come back fifteen minutes later, the dogs are gone and no one has seen them – not even the neighbors.

Meanwhile, across the street, another member of your community has just let their cat outside to patrol its turf. It’s a fat, amiable cat, who never spends any more than a few hours outdoors if he can help it. But as it grows dark, the familiar meows of “Let me in!” never come, and days pass without a sign of the fat, amiable cat.

It’s a story which has haunted American pet-owners for years: Their animals disappear without a trace. Even with microchip technology, the frantic posting of “Lost pet” posters, and repeated Craigslist ads, they are never heard from again. It’s as if they’ve been abducted. And in fact, this might well be the case…

You see, in the United States, there is a high demand for domestic animals for use in laboratory and medical science testing. Universities, chemical companies, and veterinary hospitals often perform studies on domestic cats and dogs on account of their trusting nature, which makes them easier to handle in a lab environment. They are also chosen because they are easier and less expensive to take care of than non-human primates, and live longer than lab rats.
But where do these domestic animals come from?

According to the United States Department of Agriculture, it is legal for licensed dealers to obtain domestic animals for study from shelters, breeders, and private owners. Many of these licensed dealers are also allowed to breed their own stock. But obtaining enough animals for large-scale testing institutes is often very difficult. As a result, some dealers have resorted to stealing domestic animals from various neighborhoods to feed the demand for a steady supply of test subjects.

In response to this, the United States Department of Agriculture passed the Animal Welfare Act, which states that licensed dealers must allow for a ten-day grace period when adopting from shelters so that decent pet owners have ample time to either adopt or re-claim a lost pet before it is taken to a laboratory. They are also not allowed to obtain pets from private homes unless an owner willingly hands the animal over, and must follow strict regulations when it comes to proper transport and confinement of captive pets.

Despite this, there are still numerous reports of licensed and non-licensed dealers stealing animals from homes and yards across the United States. They’ll also ‘adopt’ pets from “Free to good home ads” on Craigslist and local newspapers. Many will also visit shelters or breeders and purchase unwanted animals by the kennel-load, then sell them to ether licensed dealers, or directly to the laboratories that want them.

These pets are often carted away in trucks or vans without food or water for the duration of the trip. When they arrive at the laboratories, they are kept in a kennel for days or weeks with little to no socialization until they are needed for testing, experimentation, or dissection. Ultimately, they are killed, either by the resting itself or via euthanization once their purpose has been served.

Medical universities claim that they use dogs and cats to train students without having to use a human subject, yet other alternatives exist, including computer simulation programs which are often less expensive and more in-depth than an actual dissection or medical testing procedure. Likewise, cats and dogs make poor analogues to a human subject on account of the biological differences between our organs and theirs.

Even so, higher learning establishments including the University of Michigan, the University of Minnesota, and the University of Florida continue to purchase live and frozen domestic pet specimens for ‘educational’ use from licensed dealers. From 2005 to 2007, Purdue University even purchased 335 dogs for testing from a source which was known for multiple and repeated violations of the Animal Welfare Act.

Nevertheless, there seems to be no end in sight to the horrific act of domestic animal trafficking. A shelter will sell a cadaver for as little as $2.00 or $3.00 to a dealer, who will then sell it to a university or lab for as much as $95.00. One dealer in Illinois sold an estimated 600 animals, resulting in $210,148 in gross sales. Obviously, there is much money to be made in the sale of companion animals as test subjects, and, as a result, an entire illegal underground trade has formed.

The best thing you can do to help is simply spread the word about domestic pet trafficking. Copy and paste this text, share it with friends and family, and let the world know that you’re educated about where domestic animal test subjects really come from.

Also, if you’re planning to offer your companion animal up for adoption, get to know the person adopting it. Make sure they are legitimately interested in the welfare of your pet, and are not just another non-licensed dealer trying to score a few extra bucks. It’s also a good idea to consider putting up an adoption fee, which deters dealers from contacting you when they could find another, less-educated source to steal their animals from free of charge.

If you’re considering adopting a pet, visit shelters instead of breeders, and rescue a cat or dog which would otherwise live a life of torment in a laboratory. There are enough homeless animals in the world as it is - why buy from a breeder when you could save a life instead?

For more information regarding the domestic pet trade and for sources used for this article, visit the following websites:

http://www.dyingtolearn.org/sourceDealers.html (Includes a list of licensed dealers and the various establishments which buy from them).

http://www.banpoundseizure.org/adealers.shtml (General information on random-source dealers and pounds which supply animals for testing).

http://www.banpoundseizure.org/ethics.shtml (Further information on why domestic animals make poor test subjects).

http://www.aphis.usda.gov/animal_welfare/downloads/awa/awa.pdf (PDF file from the USDA, illustrating the Animal Welfare Act in its entirety).

http://www.humanesociety.org/issues/pets_experiments/ (Humane society’s informative article on the issue of domestic animal dealers).

On a Dare...

I've never kept a blog before. 

I'm doing so on a dare, under the condition that I keep at it for at least 6 months and see where it takes me. I don't know if I'll be able to stay persistent enough to maintain much of a following, but I do know that my life is far from 'normal', and should therefore prove to be somewhat entertaining. 

For starters, there's my job. I'm a freelance artist with a focus in taxidermy. I use recycled animal parts to create all manner of unusual and unique items, and I find my job very rewarding. 

It's an opportunity to give "new life" to an animal which has passed on, though I refuse to support trophy hunters or fur farms. It's hard for some people to accept, I know, but the way I see it, letting any part of any animal go to waste is disrespectful to that animal.

I guess it started as a personal interest in claws, teeth, and bones. They tell stories if you know how to read them. When I began making jewelry out of them, I would often make more items than I could wear, which is why I turned to eBay in an effort to sell my wares. But eBay was expensive and complicated and there was no sense of community there, which is why I eventually opened a shop with Etsy instead. 

From Etsy, my business began to expand, allowing me to delve into new projects using various different materials. Today, I specialize in making animal skin headdresses and fur tail keychains, though I often have a few claws, teeth, and photography prints in stock, as well. 

Full black wolf skin headdress commissioned by a friend. 

Working with wildlife parts is not only rewarding in that it's fun business. You can also gain an intimate understanding of the animals whose bones or skin you're working with. I can tell what species a fur coat was made from just by the texture of the hairs, even if it's been dyed or sheared, and can identify the difference between a fake tiger tooth and a real one just by looking at a picture of it. I've actually considered a career in wildlife forensics as a result, which is one of the main reasons I chose to attend Southern Oregon University in Ashland. 

As a result of my job, my life is very closely-intertwined with nature, wildlife, and death. I spend much of my free time running around in the Siskiyou Wilderness, photographing wildlife, and meditating on life in general. But I also allow myself to have a bit of fun with my job, which is why I sometimes show up at the 7/11 across the street at odd hours of the night with a coyote pelt on my head to buy all their beef jerky. I've even snowboarded with a wolf on, and was once questioned by police while sporting a mountain lion headdress.

Aside from my strange job, there's also the fact that I have a neurological condition called Synesthesia. To put it simply, I see colors in my head for various triggers such as numbers, letters, days of the week, and months of the year. I also see colors for personalities, music, and even orgasms. It's apparently rather rare, though I tend to think more people have it than are aware of it. After all, I thought it was perfectly normal to see these color until I was 17, when my physics teacher briefly mentioned it during a lecture on optics. After that, I began to focus more intimately on the colors in my head, and have now identified that I've got at least thirteen different forms of the condition. 

What I see while listening to the song "Goodbye Blue Sky" by Pink Floyd. 

Commissioned by David Coalburn

Then, there's the travel. I've done a lot of it, visiting and living in such places as Jakarta, Malaysia, Lombok, Singapore, England, Wales, Cuba, and the Cayman Islands. Along the way, I've met many fantastic people and animals, and it has certainly changed who I am as a person. I don't think I could ever stop travelling now that I've got a thirst for it, which worries me in some ways and keeps me excited in others. Being in college now, travel is not something I have either time or money for, yet I somehow manage to seek out adventure nonetheless, often in the form of camping excursions and road trips with friends. 

In short, my life is rather quirky and unique - often playing out like some kind of adventure novel. I have no idea how I've been so lucky to experience all the things I have, but I do know that I never want it to stop. I'm having too much fun already, and I'm nowhere close to running out of steam!